It was indeed yoga pants girl standing in front of me fidgiting nervously. When I seen she was alone I calmed down a bit and asked her how I could help her. She looked at the ground and asked if I had been sniffing her butt in the store! I quickly started denying it, but she interrupted me and proceeded to tell me she wasn't a hooker or anything, and had never done anything like this before, but she needed money to buy her son some Christmas presents, and if I wanted to, she'd let me sniff her bum if I bought her a few things from the store! I was shocked and speechless, but when she quickly turned around and started to walk away, I called to her and told I would love to help her out. She sheepishly walked back to my car and climbed in the passenger seat. She had thought about doing it in the parking lot, and getting it over and done with, problem being, it was Christmas and too busy to try such a thing. We finally agreed on going to her place, provided I bought her stuff first and. Well after a lot of flashbulbs popping and backslapping and slipping of envelopes into jacket pockets (and phone numbers into other pockets) and lots of toothy grins and encouragement of how swell everything was, I slipped off and grabbed a couple of drinks and some finger food. Hell, I wasn't going to be the only sober one in this crowd! I mean, thank God for the doobie I inhaled on the drive down or this would have been a bum trip, but thanks to the smoke I was getting the munchies. I tried hitting on a few of the drunker women, but they took one look at my dirty Nikes and laughed 86 proof fumes in my face. I've met whores who were more honest about the financial arrangements involved than these high class hookers were - at least a whore states the price in dollars, not percentages of net income!About my third drink, Annabelle fished me out of a conversation with some dude about THE BANKING CRISIS (my idea of a banking crisis is when my ATM card is siezed by the machine and.
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